Wednesday, September 10, 2008


I went to the gym this morning. Nothing unusual there, I do that almost every day. But today I had a small problem – I couldn’t unlock my locker when I was done.

The lockers at my gym are nice. There’re big, which is great for winter coats and stuff. And you don’t need a key or a padlock. They’re set up like hotel safes. There’s a keypad. To lock it you enter in any 4-digit code and then to unlock it you enter in the same code.

I always use the same code. And I try to use the same locker – or one near it.

This morning I knew I used locker #34. But when I tapped in my code after my workout, it didn’t open.


So I thought, maybe someone else had typed in one digit before I got to it, so I tried various combinations of my code.

No joy.

Finally, feeling really stoopid, I went to the front desk and asked for the master key. I met the chief custodian at my locker and she was about to use the master key on it when one of the other custodians came rushing over.

“Oh! That’s mine!” she said and typed out her code and opened the locker. And, Yep, her stuff was inside.

I felt even more stoopid and checked in the lockers around #34 – all of which were unlocked.

All empty.


Then, the second custodian reached into #34, and pulled my jacket out from under hers.


Obviously, I had forgotten to lock my locker. I do that sometimes. It’s really early when I get there and my brain cells don’t get moving until I’ve been on the treadmill for a few minutes.

It’s no big deal. None of the people at my gym seem shifty (yes, I know I’m naïve…!) And besides, the only thing in there was my cheap workout jacket and my house key – which only works on the inner door and wouldn’t do a thief any good unless s/he had the outer door key or the building code.

So anyway, I obviously forgot to lock it and then the second custodian came and put her stuff in with mine and locked it. The head custodian frowned at her and told her not to do it again. I just smiled, thanked them both and left with my jacket.

But seriously. WTFuck? There are about 200 lockers in that locker room and there couldn’t have been more than 30 women on the exercise floor this morning. This chick couldn’t pick ANOTHER locker? One that didn’t have someone else’s stuff in it?

I don’t know. Maybe she thought she was “protecting” my stuff. Or maybe she didn’t notice my jacket – it IS kind of small and black. But…????

Anyway… It’s been one of those mornings.

When I got home, I noticed that one of the light-bulbs over the bathroom sink had died and I had to replace it with one of those new, ugly, energy-efficient ones because I didn’t have time to search for a prettier, old-style type. Then the shower started to not drain properly and I discovered that I’m out of Drano.


And then later – I am so not kidding!!!! – as I was rushing to leave my apartment, the F ing hem fell out of the right leg of my pants. Come ON!!! No way did I have time to fix it, so I had to do a quick change.

And now I’m on the El and my left sock is a quitter. I just can’t catch a break.

At least I didn’t decide to cut my hair this morning…

I hope everyone is having a better day than I am!!!


Garth said...

A couple of those problems would be solved by wearing a skirt. *wink*

Hope your afternoon picks up for the better.

EEE said...

Haha! Yeah... but it's getting to the point where, in order to wear a skirt, I also need to wear tights.

That's a whole 'nother can of problems...

Anonymous said...

That chick has a crush on you, EEE. That's what I think. Otherwise, why take the same locker?