We women do stupid things where men are concerned. We stay in bad relationships because we think it is easier than finding a new relationship or (horrors!) being alone.
It’s a remarkable talent. Sort of like the Force, only less useful when you’ve got a Y-wing fighter that needs lifting out of swampy bog.
I have it. My friends have it. My sister has it.
Boy howdy does my sister have it.
Her baby-daddy aside (I’m fairly certain that Lump of Nothing is out of her life now except where the kids are concerned) she’s been with this other guy for the past several years off and on.
And recently, they’ve been technically “off”
He had a new girlfriend, which Jo knew about. That didn’t stop her from sleeping with Lump of Nothing II whenever he’d come around, though.
Yeah. That was gonna end well.
It all came to a head last night. She called me just as I was eating dinner, in a complete emotional meltdown. Long story short: LoN2 is an asshole. (OK, so he’s not an asshole, he’s just a human being who did something really shitty)
Apparently, he told her over the weekend that he’d broken up with the gf and that Jo was the one he REALLY loved and he could now date her openly.
And then (wow, this feels like a really lame version of “The Young and the Stoopid”) one of LoN2’s friends calls Jo and, (for whatever reason) tells her that LoN2 has been lying to her (I know, Shocker!) that he had told the gf (not ex, as it turns out – again: Shocker!) that Jo was “A psychotic bitch. I’ve told her to leave me alone but she won’t!”
This, more than anything, hurt her deeply. She could take him cheating on her or even dumping her, but telling such a hurtful lie about her…? That was just too much.
But it was very difficult for me to be sympathetic. I hurt because I knew she was hurting, but it was all I could do not to yell: “Why are you so stoopid?! You knew he was lying to the gf when he was stepping out with you! Why on earth wouldn’t he lie to you too?”
But I didn’t say that. At least, not in quite so harsh a way. I waited until she was a bit calmer, and tried to explain that some people will say or do whatever they have to say to get what they want. And clearly he felt that’s what he had to say to his gf when she caught him out about Jo.
I hold little hope, though, that this is the last we will hear of LoN2. Time heals all wounds and erases all common sense. Especially when orgasms are involved.
And I can’t even talk. I’ve been guilty of staying in relationships long past their Sell-By dates because I liked the IDEA of the relationship too much to let it go. But I try to be smarter (and harder) now.
It’s just so hard to watch someone you care about make the wrong choices and know that she’ll get hurt again and again. And she will. Jo doesn’t like to be alone, much though I’ve tried to convince her it’s the best thing for her.
Sigh. What can you do?
Oh well. May the Force be with You. The good Force, I mean, the one that lifts rocks and connects all living things….
OK, now I’m rambling. Have a great day!