Thursday, May 22, 2008

Doctor Google

So, slightly less freaked out about my dad after talking to him yesterday

(A huge THANKS to all my imaginary friends for all your kind thoughts and wishes!!)

Of course I decide to turn to the premier medical authority of the modern age. That's right: Doctor Google.

Do you know what you get when you Google "bladder tumor"??

You guessed it: Links about CANCER.

Yikes!

Pretty much every article about bladder tumors that I have found center on Bladder Cancer. Though several acknowledge that bladder tumors can be "cancerous or non-cancerous" most of the information is clearly directed towards Cancer sufferes.
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After a bit of research it seems that Stage 0 Bladder Cancer (the earliest and most easily treated stage) is found only in the "inner lining" of the bladder. My father's tumors are limited to the OUTER lining of the bladder, and they were definitely NOT malignant so he is pretty much in the clear.
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Still.
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But this got me thinking about my good friend Doctor Google.
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I am a hypochondriac-by-proxy. Not your garden variety hypochondriac. I don't self-diagnose. That would be much too pedestrian. No, I love to diagnose the people around me. I adore cataloging their symptoms and researching possible causes and treatments.
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"You have an itchy rash? Must be lupus!!!" (I watch WAY too much "House" and they diagnose lupus at least once per episode...)
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A couple years ago, my friend Rachel's 3yo daughter fell off the jungle gym in their backyard while I was visiting and hit her head. She jumped right back up, smiling and laughing. I was convinced she had CIPA (Congenital insensitivity to pain with anhidrosis)
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Of course she didn't, but that didn't stop me from doing extensive research on the topic for the following week. That was pretty fun.
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Why am I so weird?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

EEE, as soon as you said Lupus, I thought, she's been watching way too much House. But is there such a thing as too much?

Oh, BTW, all of my daughter's imaginary friends on Facebook have changed their walls to read, "RIP, CTB." I knew you'd appreciate that.

As for me, when someone hits their head, I'm thinking subdural hematoma. (I guess I watched too much M*A*S*H in my youth.)

EEE said...

Oh! I was both impressed that they had the balls to finally let someone DIE on that show and sad that it had to be the Cut-Throat-Bitch!!!

I loved her.

And she looked SO pretty in the after-death-with-House scene...

Anonymous said...

Yeah, what was up with that? They should have made her cute the whole time, not just after she was dead. I was pretty shocked they actually killed her off. Now I wonder what's going to happen between Wilson and House next season. Is the bro-mance over?

EEE said...

Maybe Wilson will break into his father's study and kill himself with his father's revolver...

Wait... That was Dead Poets Society...

Anonymous said...

OK, one more haiku then I'll stop.

Cut Throat Bitch is gone
Took the wrong kind of flu pills
Then rode the wrong bus

Anonymous said...

Hey EEE glad to hear that your dad is better. What a scare.

Yes, Amber did look pretty in the "death" scene. I wonder if all the actors that are being killed off in these series' closers wanted to run for greener pastures or if the shows just wanted a bigger audience.